Low Expectations

I went to a conference for students this week and one of the options was a tour to an outdoor location. This conference attracted students from all over the province, so on the tour there were about 25 students from many different boards. The tour involved a bus ride of about half an hour, followed by a guided walk-through of a very interesting new technology that took about 15 minutes. We then got back on the bus for a 15 minute question-and-answer session before the ride back to the hotel. In short, the tour was about 90 minutes long in the middle of what would otherwise have been a normal school day. I should also mention that it was chilly and raining lightly, so the 15 minute outdoor part was less than ideal.

On the bus ride to the tour location, a group of six students from the same school took up residence at the back of the bus and laughed loudly, and told profanity-infused stories about terribly inappropriate things while their very young teacher supervisor sat in the front seat and looked out the window. At that point, I figured I'd give the new teacher a break and try to control my judgement. It was probably her first field trip and she likely hasn't found her stride in asserting herself.

Then we got off the bus and the tour began. Once again the teacher distanced herself from her group and they started to talk instead of listening to the guide. After other teachers shot their trademarked teacher glares, young teacher went over to the students and and said that they "were making her look bad, and could they pleeeeeassse stop it?" all the while mugging a cutesy look of disapproval.

Then the students began a loud ritual of throat clearing and spitting. At that point, no longer able to withstand the display, I went over to the students and asked who was supervising them, because while students may behave badly and be disrepectful of their teachers, they will also protect them. They motioned to their teacher, and she noticed the exchange. Just as I suspected, their behaviour improved - the simple plan worked. The remaining few minutes of the tour were much more enjoyable, until the teacher approached me and said "I'm sooooooo soooorrrrrry about that!" as though speaking to her best friend. She then continued with "I think they're doing pretty well, considering they have to be outside in this crappy weather. I'm soooooo cold!" We were walking toward the bus by this point, and she scooted to the front of the group so she could get back on first. On the bus ride back, the students behaved just as they had on the way there.

I was dumbfounded. That 15 minutes said so much to me about where we are at, and I rode the bus back to the hotel with thoughts swirling in my head.

1) If not on this tour, the students and teacher would have been in school. Attending a field trip is a privilege for all parties. If we consider a field trip that involves 15 minutes of light rain a hardship, we are in serious trouble.

2) I'm not sure what the connection is between unfavourable weather and bad manners, but apparently we can justify behaving poorly (the students) and being bratty (teacher) if conditions are less than perfect. I see this as a serious problem today - the slightest of inconveniences are considered a good reason for failing to meet expectations.

3) At one point in time, people felt shame and were moved to change by it. The teacher was obviously so confident in her approach that even the disapproval of an older member of the tribe did not faze her. She cared enough to address the problem by saying she was sorry, but she didn't change her approach at all. If this same thing had happened to me ten years ago, I would have felt terrible and been bugged for days. I'm quite certain her only thoughts were that I was an unfair, judgy sort of person who needs to lighten up, and I'd guess even those thoughts were fleeting.

4) Teachers need to be militant in their commitment to high expectations. Without high standards we allow our young people to progress with mediocre attempts, and they will bring these habits into the workforce.

I feel much better having posted this, but I'm still worried.

Who was the one bad kid that ruined the others?

I work with young folks in my job, and sometimes they do things their parents don't like. Once things start heading off the rails, a meeting is called. Now that I'm old and crabby and have chaired a number of these meetings, I would respectfully like to submit that the phrase "fell into a bad crowd" be forever removed from the English language.

Who was the one bad seed that started this whole chain? Did this Miscreant Zero systemically seek out a comrade, brainwash them and bring them to the dark side? Did the pair become a trio, then a quartet, and so on? If so, the methods of these rascals should be taught to the highest levels of intelligence, because they seem to be terribly effective AND best of all, the brainwashee DOESN'T SEEM TO MIND ONE BIT. In fact, all signs suggest that they relish their new edgy lifestyle.

Can we start being a little more honest and realistic when our youths disappoint us? For whatever reason, they were attracted to hanging with kids that make poor decisions, and wanted to make some bad decisions themselves. Deal with it - your kid made a mistake (or many), and blaming some other kid isn't the answer. Start talking, keep better tabs on them, and don't be afraid to have the kid hate you for a bit.

No room in the fridge.

Lunchbox technology has come a long way since the days of my Punky Brewster little-plastic-suitcase-with-a-matching-thermos combo. Today's lunchboxes are sewn from fabrics capable of withstanding a 50-year storm, in a variety of stylish prints. Open them up and you'll find layers of insulation and a shiny silver liner that keeps the leaks in. Many also come with small freezer packs that fit into mesh pockets. This obsession with refrigeration makes me wonder if my mom was trying to kill me by putting a tuna-fish sandwich in an uninsulated lunchbox that spent the morning in my schoolbag on a hook at the back of the classroom.

Every weekday morning I attempt to put my single plastic container of leftovers in the office fridge, and am bugged like hell to find that every last bit of space is occupied by massive insulated lunch bags. What the hell? Isn't the point of the insulated lunch bag to keep your lunch cool where refrigeration is not available? Why both? Why can't these people take the part of their lunch that needs to be kept cold out of the bag?

As always, I suspect this is a situation that could be solved if the perpetrators experienced the inconvenience. Perhaps this week I'll use huge containers in a huge bag for my leftovers, and arrive at work early enough to ensure some shelf space.

Ecosins and Ecoguilt

What's bugging me today is me, because I'm suffering from ecoguilt. My school switched to a Kuerig coffee maker this year and I committed an ecosin and signed up. Every day after lunch I enjoy a cup of coffee to go with whatever I bought at the latest bake sale fundraiser, and get a little pang of ecoguilt as I toss the little plastic K-cup. The worst part of it all is that it's probably one of my favourite moments of the day, because damn that coffee is good. It's so unbelievably good that I think about it all morning. It's so perfectly tasty that I occasionally consider committing an even worse ecosin and get a Kuerig for my home.

I can't buy a Kuerig for my home. I abhor single servings and overpackaging. I buy goods that are more expensive but use less packaging because I think it's important to back responsible companies. I can't buy a Kuerig for my home because the ecoguilt would slowly kill me.

But here's what's bugging me the most. Sometimes I get a little down about all of this ecostuff, because it's easy up here in Canada to be like me - making responsible decisions and honestly feeling like I'm making a difference. I live where good things are happening - the government backs green projects and nearly everybody recycles and composts. But then this summer I travelled to Hawaii and was shocked to find out there was no curbside recycling program. A friend recently returned from living in metropolitan Australia and reported the same.

What? Am I looking at the world through green-coloured glasses? Here I am reading labels in an attempt to make the best environmental decisions, spending more money to buy responsibly, dutifully rinsing recyclables, fretting about using a little plastic cup each day, and there are G8 nations who don't have widespread recycling programs? What the hell is the world going to do when the 2.5 billion BRICians currently stretching at the blocks are officially in the race to consume? Is my unwillingness to buy a Keurig coffee maker the equivalent of bailing the Titanic with a K-cup? Am I really making a difference, or just making myself feel good?

I suspect deep down I know the answer, but I'm choosing to ignore it. It can't hurt, right?

Facebook: You're in or you're out.

I'm increasingly bugged by Facebook snobbery. I'm on Facebook, I like it, and I'm not ashamed of it. I find it a fun way to keep up with folks, share information and see what's going on with my favourite causes/bands/businesses. It doesn't rule my world and hasn't replaced every activity I used to do pre-Facebook.

Yup, it can be frustrating. I don't like everything I come across, just like I don't like everything I come across in the non-Facebook world. I don't understand Mafia Wars, but I don't understand Nascar either. I get annoyed at status updates, but I also get rankled at staff meetings.

It's become quite popular to trash Facebook, to proclaim how it's narcissistic, lame and boring, and sniff at users for their pedestrian tastes. If you're in this group, fine, I'll objectively listen to what you have to say once you've permanently deleted your account and sworn on whatever you believe in that you'll never, ever, visit the site or peek at what others are up to through a friend's profile.

As far as I'm concerned, if you have an account you're lurking around. I know you're there. I know you check status updates and pictures and get a little rush when your old high school flame sends you a message. Just because you don't update your status, post items or play Mafia Wars doesn't make you any less a user, and doesn't give you the right to publicly opine on those who do.

Put up or shut up. If you truly don't use Facebook, make it so. I bet you'll miss it.

Here we go again...

Another case of the you's:

Tom Brady says of having a child out of wedlock, "That's not how you envisioned your life, that's not how you envisioned having children, but it happens. Life is not living in the suburbs with a white picket fence. That's not life. Somehow our American culture has made it out that that's what life needs to be-and that if it's not that, it's all screwed up. It's not. You go through life and you try the best you can." (JustJared)

AAAARRRRGGGGHHHHH! This drives me (not you) nuts. In my (not your) crabby little world this is how it should read:

Tom Brady says of having a child out of wedlock, "That's not how I envisioned my life, that's not how I envisioned having children, but it happens. Life is not living in the suburbs with a white picket fence. That's not life. Somehow our American culture has made it out that that's what life needs to be-and that if it's not that, it's all screwed up. It's not. I go through (my) life and try the best I can."

There, that's better. No projection onto me.

We'll do something once somebody dies.

Bro and I were out for a spin yesterday and witnessed four people who could have safely stopped at a yellow light speed on through. The two cars in front were probably legal, but the two behind them were definitely entering the intersection when the light turned red.

A cop was stopped at the cross street and did nothing, and there was no way he didn't notice.

Blowing red lights is epidemic in these parts, and has been for years. I'm convinced a minivan full of toddlers getting t-boned is the only thing going to change the level of enforcement, and the only thing that will change poor driving habits is enforcement. Whatever happened to governing oneself in the interest of public safety?

Until then, I'll continue to look both ways and creep into intersections once the light turns green, and give dirty looks into the rearview mirrors of the assholes, because I'm behind the stupid fools at the next light. Good thing you raced there, fuckwit.